My question has been,

“How do I become a Woman of God?”

I see this gaping hole when it comes to defining who we are and what we hope it will look like.

At least with art, we have mother Mary on one end and goddesses on the other. Mother Mary seemed unattainable and I knew I was no where near that. The goddess pictures were beautiful, but I know I am not someone to ever be worshipped or idolized, so that wouldn't do.

I needed something pointing to God and at the same time saying I am His Beloved and He is well please with me. I needed it to be hopefilled and honest. 

This idea really began when I was in what is known as my Dark Night of the Soul. As my friend Natasha so kindly puts it, the dark night is not an optional step in discipleship. It is an invitation He, the King His children invites in to. 

It is an invitation, but in it, you will die completely to your own way of living. Laying down the learned habits picked up from experience or inherited.

It will put them to death, so we can live in the way of wholeness, from the love of the One who made us.

In the darkness of that season I wrestled with my mind, my emotions completely ruled by my thoughts. I had to learn what it meant to take every thought captive out of necessity. Thinking at the time I was going crazy because I had never seen anyone go through what was happening to me. 

It was only in hindsight I saw it clearly. All I knew then was that He was calling me to Himself.

To be His child, to address all the pains and hurt I had pushed down. He was inviting me to heal, to know what true love really looked like and I had the chance to say yes or no. It was a choice every day to address the past, the reality of my actions and fear formed thoughts.

Like Mary, I had a choice, it was going to happen regardless, so how would I respond? I made a moment by moment choice to choose God over my thoughts, over my fears, over my circumstances. I said say yes. And it’s been a one step at a time journey in learning I am fully His, in becoming a woman of rest. 

I had no idea how to rest. Work was my rhythm, doing my way of life.

With a thousand and one questions, I began to demand answers from God.

Yes, I am extremely demanding when we chat. He already knows what I’m thinking and feeling, so I figure, why hide it? 

In very loud, angry ways, I would scream out. He was always there, even if I didn’t feel it. His words said so and I choose to believe it.

Just like that season, I didn’t know where to begin again when it came to a picture, something to put on my wall to see when I wake up, when I question.

Mary seemed the only thing that soothed my creative hand and longing heart.

God trusted her with His own child and her response was one I needed to adopt as my own. The Bible is our roadmap to living the way God can best protect and prosper us, it had worked in every other area of my life, so what may seem obvious was an epiphany for me. Since digging into reading the bits about her there are I keep feeling there is so much more 'He wants to impart.

This collection is the beginning of Morehouse. Becoming a woman at rest is an adventure, so the Woman of God collection will be to.

Each month a new woman of God will be released. In this first release, She Believed, includes women of so many different cultures.  We don’t know what she looked like and I know we could guess, but I wanted to communicate the mystery of who she was because Mary could have been any of us. I believe God wants us to know that. 

She was the beginning of feminine faith. A person of belief in the midst of what seemed absolutely and ridiculously impossible.

So much of life seems and feels impossible so often. Healthy relationships seemed a made up idea from where I stood, healing my heart was ludicrous at one point, a family that doesn't hate each other was out of the question, going to my hometown without shame would be a miracle. All of these ideas seemed impossible, but each and every area has been or is being made new and alive. I am completely redeemed, at least in these areas.

His ability to create is bewildering. I really am a new creation and God is in the business of making masterpieces.

Mary knew God, she knew who she was as His child and her role as a daughter. I didn't always know God wanted me and that I am a cherished gift God gave unto Himself. Bringing life to Mary in these images comes from my first hand experience of that truth I now know for myself. 

My hope with this collection is for it to be a reminder of the gift of life He has given us. To choose faith and His goodness over what we see in front of us. For people to experience more of who He is and how loved they are.

With love, from a very grateful woman at rest,